This is the final Life Legacy Impacting Concepts. Friendship!
I saved Friendship to the last because it is the most powerful, intimate and impacting of the three concepts; and it is the only one in which we have 100% opportunity to choose. The other 2 concepts, Association, and Relationship can just happen; but Friendship is a choice by both people involved. Friendship should be a choice because it requires the most work with the greatest reward. Before we go into a deeper look at Friendships, let’s learn 3 more things about Life Legacy:
1) Life Legacy should affect our Professional and Genealogical Legacy; whereas it does not work in the other direction. Example: How we gain our income should not change who we are, but our Life Legacy choices can change how we gain our income.
2) Life Legacy is forgiving. We can mess up really bad due to immaturity or lack of knowledge, and as we learn from our experiences our Life Legacy is rewritten. Example: Choices we make in our early adult life, like the wrong job or mate; seem like it will negatively impact our legacy; but as we go on and make wiser choices; the past is just that the past and although it is part of the legacy, it’s impact or influence in our legacy is rewritten.
3) Life Legacy is not chronologically; so we do not have to worry about when we do something, it is just that we did. Example: Because our life legacy is about WHO we are and not WHAT we do; when you as a teacher stayed to give extra help to a child that was having trouble reading; your written legacy was not that you helped, it was that you cared. The WHO versus the WHAT. And because our life legacy is not chronological, it does not write that you cared in 1970; you JUST CARED!
Friendship, true friendship is not found in a group, but a chosen few. Let’s look at it in this way; in the Bible, we find where Jesus was surrounded by 3 different groups.
1) The Multitude: (Association) These were people that loved His teaching and had a common bond of the hunger for the Word of God.
2) 12 Disciples: (Relationships) These individuals were who He spent the most time with and that had the opportunity to gain understanding from Him and His mission on earth.
3) 3 Inner Circle: (Friendships) These 3 men were chosen to be closer to Jesus than others, and the ones that waiting with Him as He prepared to go through His greatest purpose.
Another way to look at it is in our everyday life:
1) Neighborhood or workplace: (Association) These are co-workers, shop owners, neighbors; people that you know based on the interaction.
2) Family: (Relationships) These are those that surround you and your life with love and a common bond.
3) Chosen: (Friendships) These are those “gems” that you select as you go through your life to be a blessing without counting on be blessed by; but they always do, just by being true.
Friendship is the most intimate and costly of the 3 Concepts because we open up a greater part of our past, present, and future life when we chose to engage in a Friendship.
Here are 3 ways we know that we have a Friend.
1) We look forward to spending time with them regardless of how the last visit ending or what it involved. Example: The last time you saw your friend they brought to light something that you were doing that was not beneficial to our best life, and it hurt. But you are still excited to see them tomorrow.
2) We remember what means a lot to them more than we remember how they have graced our life. Example: On Saturday you have planned to meet for a movie; you without thought select a movie you know they will enjoy without thinking if the last time you went to a movie it was what you liked or they liked. Friendship is not about taking turns, it is about spending time.
3) We are not eager to introduce them to others that are not equal in friendship. Example: A new person in your life hears about your friendship with another, and asks if they can join you the next time you go to a concert. Before giving agreement, you consult with your friend and do not feel uncomfortable saying when asked, “let me check with my friend and I will let you know.” This protects the friendship from familiarity, and lets consideration be the center at all times.
Friendship can seem to weaken or fade when circumstances cause spending time together difficult or impossible for a season. But if it is true Friendship, as soon as you get together on the phone or in person; the embers of the well-established Friendship is ignited and for a few minutes it is like no one ever moved.
I desire to inspire you to select your friendships wisely and know that no greater love than a man than to lay his life down for his friend. Whom do you call Friend?