What I could change, but don’t!

What I could change, but don’t!

I have heard, “just live with it” many times in life, and it upset me because they did not have to live with it, I did! And at times, friends and family added a caveat to try and make me feel better, like, “just live with it, for now.” They did not understand that it did not make me feel better, it left me feeling hopeless.

But even more difficult to handle is when I heard, “just live with it” within myself. And the unspoken caveat in me was, “because you know it will never change, even though it could.” Ouch!

Then through prayer and self-reflection, I realized there were things I found “the art of living with” in my life. Knowing I could change but didn’t was heartbreaking until I grabbed onto the hope of God’s Word and the grace of His character.

The Art of Something

The art of something is when we move into it with everything we have, creating beautiful work by using our imagination and proven truths.

My friends, it has been my experience that what I could change but don’t bothers me more than the things I don’t like but can not change, such as my height, lack of natural creativity, or even my sense of humor. I cannot change them, but I found peace because God created me this way.

Issues of life that we choose to live with vary greatly. Maybe it is the fear of starting a business or leaving a bad relationship. Or perhaps you have given up on going back to school. All of these things you could change, and you know you could, but you have not done it yet.

Sharing one of my “living with it, for now” issues.

I am sharing one of the long-standing areas that I learned the art of living with, knowing I can change, but don’t. It is my weight! Being over-weight has been a pain point throughout my life.

For many, many years, I dealt with it; I did not live with it. I dealt with being over-weight by managing the situation through acceptance that it could never change, and that left me feeling powerless.

Dealing with what I could change wrecked havoc in every area of my life. My mind, soul, body, and spirit were assaulted by the voices of worthlessness, judgment, and hopelessness. I thought I had no defense against the attacks because I could change it if I wanted to, right?

Dealing with it, was like being in a boxing match, dodging the attacks while looking for the ropes to hang on to because I did not understand the art of living with it,

Living with it is staying in the fight while looking for the opening to become a champion.

Dealing with it is based on the acceptance of no change that brings condemnation. But living with it is not about acceptance, it is centered on the awareness that I can change, even if I have not, yet.

After years of dealing with being overweight, and seeing friends and family lose weight, while I invested money and energy in weight loss programs, that I did not use, I was so exhausted and disappointed; I cried out to God, and He heard me.

1 John 5:14 says, And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.

God heard me! , and guiding me to Psalm 27:13 So I pondered this scripture in my heart. As I pondered, I realized that I had entered into despair because I no longer believed that I would change. Even though I knew I could, I lost hope and the awareness of who God was.

It was Psalm 27:13 that God used to guide me away from despair and gave me hope that there will be a time that I will change. Even though today, I am living with it, I can have hope because of God that I am living with it, for now

To Ponder

To ponder is to carefully reflect, consider, and appraise the worth of something before making a decision or coming to a conclusion. Pondering God’s Word is a weapon we have against all that is untrue or unworthy of our attention.

As we read God’s Word, He will breathe on different scriptures at various times to give us hope, bring correction, give direction, for just a few of the ways God speaks to us through His Word.

In Psalm 27 God reminded me that I have the power of transformation available to me through believing in His goodness. His goodness will not permit despair to stop me from trusting that in a tomorrow I will change, and for now, I can live with it.

His goodness enables us not to despair no matter the circumstances or the voices that speak in our “for now” time. For now, is the time between knowing we can change and actually walking in His changing power.

At times goodness is thought of as kindness. Although kindness is a powerful virtue of being generous and considerate to others, goodness is doing what is righteous and right with the power to know the difference. The goodness of God is about who He is, not what He does. God is righteous, and God is Goodness.

Another Psalm reveals to us the surety of God’s Goodness in our life. Psalm 23:6 says, “Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life.”

So no matter what you are living with, for now, His Goodness follows you, and His Goodness will give you what you need to change. Never give up, never embrace despair because He is waiting for us to turn toward His goodness.

Today I “live with, for now,” being overweight. I will not be stuck in no change by dealing with being overweight. Because I would have despaired unless I would have believed to see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.

Or as I pray, “Thank you, Lord, that I don’t despair about being overweight, because the goodness of God keeps the door of hope open to me with the truth that I am living with being overweight, for now. My change will come, as it becometh me. Glory!

It does not matter what you are living with that you could change, but have not, hold on to Psalm 27:13 and declare, “I would have despaired, unless I would have believed to see the goodness of God, in the land of the living.,”

And believe what Psalm 23:6 promises, “Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life.” This shows us that God never gives up on us, no matter how long we struggle with our issues, He will always hear our cry, as we see in 1 John 5:14, “And this is the confidence that we have in him, that, if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.” Glory!

Until next time, remember, we craft our legacy daily, do it as it becometh you.

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This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Novella Jenkins

    Thank you for being so open and candid. This so true. I feel sometimes like I am stuck in a place of no change but I also know that it is a lie from the devil. It is sometimes stemming from my lack of motivation. We, after all, can do all things through Christ who gives us the strength. I am thinking about Dr Aiken’s teaching on Being Stuck which I read on yesterday. I also was reminded about the serenity prayer help me to change what I can and accept what I can’t. One thing about the Lord – He knows our limitations being as we are but dust. But I love that His mercies are new every morning and Great is His faithfulness!!! He is our greatest advocate in all things and I am so glad to be His child and to have Him as my Father. I am striving to do better in this new year and work on getting my poetry books up and running. I have been working on that project since last week. Pray for me as I pray for you. And again thank you for sharing this enlightening article.

    1. Jane Babich

      Oh Novella So happy you are working on your poems, very exciting. Thanks for your encouragement as we both grow in grace and be more transparent before each other. 2021 for me, is to Be Intentional in all I do. Yes we will pray for each other. Blessings

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